Stuffed Peppers

"If I were a customer, and I was given a dish with peppers, I would hate it."

-Ferran Adria

Pulling another great recipe from the Great Box of Mom Recipes, this is a quick meal you can have ready with little effort and some prep. Yes, it takes a bit in the oven, but that's time you can spend doing other things. Like reading doofy food blogs, and wondering who will win the Bachelor.

Let's stuff some peppers?

I guess I owe you an apology of sorts. I've been busy with things outside of the site, which has caused a few issues. You know, like people questioning whether or not I was still alive, or whether I had simply forgotten that my own pet project existed. Though the latter option is not beyond the scope of my normal idiocy, I have not forgotten about this site.

My excuse (definitely not a reason. An excuse.) is that I was busy doing some travelling, volunteering, and getting engaged. So, in case you were mad about the lack of updates (but let's be honest, there are four people reading this blog in total, so, come on. You're not mad), you should feel bad. Just kidding. I'll make it up to you, I swear. I won't, but I'm going to tell you I will.

Anyway. Stuffed peppers, huh? I'll admit; they're not pretty, they don't wow, but they're fun to make, and they're an easy meal on a weekday night. Are you going to use this to impress the boss when you invite him over for a 50s-style dinner escapade? No. Are you going to impress yourself, since all you do is sit on the couch, waiting for the Domino's driver to show up? Yes! A resounding yes!

Yes, I went there. Don't give me that look. Domino's is a sometimes food, and you know that.

Before we start, I want to point out that this is an extremely versatile recipe. With the filling, you can basically plug in any flavor profile you want. Though this recipe is mainly rice, beef, and tomato sauce, I have also made this with ground chicken and feta, enchilada sauce and steak, and a few other weird permutations. If you're afraid of being creative in the kitchen, this would be a great recipe to tweak to your own tastes. Our Chicken Rice Tremendous is pretty similar, in that sense; the original didn't call for curry, but boy howdy, was it good with it! You might find that magic addition to make this a staple in your house, home, apartment, or cardboard box.

So, this is going to be the basic version. Make changes where you see fit, and frequently taste as you go. Capiche? Cool. You're going to need the following:

"Hey AC, is 'filthy cutting board' on the list, too?" Don't be that guy. I was in the middle of a cooking spree.

• 4 large bell peppers
• ~2 cups tomato sauce
• 1 pound ground beef or taco meat
• 2 large green onions
• 1 tsp salt
• 1 tbsp crushed garlic
• 1 cup cooked rice
• 1 tsp chili powder
• 1 pinch cayenne
• Black pepper

Get a big ol' pot of water boiling with some salt in it, to cook your peppers. While you're doing this, let's prep the rest of everything, so this goes as smoothly as possible. You're going to want to start by cutting around the stems of the peppers, so you've got a big ol' hole in the top. Scoop out the inside seeds and seedpod thing, and do your best to not puncture the outside of the pepper. This could result in a subpar eating experience, a mess in your baking pan, or explosive decompression.

WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE PEPPERS?

Okay, maybe not explosive decompression. But I love the idea of a dinner ending in such a catastrophe. Anyway, core and seed those bad boys, and set them aside. Get your onions, and get ready to learn a secret trick for getting similarly-sized pieces of onion every time. Magic, I know. What you're going to want to do is cut the end of the onion off, and then cut a grid into the end of the onion. 

Like that. I think.

Then, once you start chopping, you've got nice dices, and not some hack job. But, you're eating stuffed peppers, not endangered quail, or something. So it's not like it NEEDS to be pretty. I just thought I'd go over this neat trick.

Hmm. I guess it didn't really matter, anyway. Whoops.

In the time that it took you to do this, your water may be boiling. Fantastic! Throw your peppers into the water, and cook them for 5 minutes. Please, no more than 5 minutes. Fewer minutes might even be smarter. Remember, these are going to bake. We just want to take the raw edge off of them and do a quick blanch.

It's like a hot tub, but with more vegetable death.

But wait! remember to poke them down and fill them with water. That way, they're going to evenly cook.

Die, fools!

Also, please be careful. When you push the peppers down, more likely than not, a bunch of boiling hot water is going to shoot into the air. This will most likely be towards your hand. It might be smarter (not 'might'. It IS smarter) to coax the pepper on its side, and gently let in water. Just a tip. From someone who has burnt his hands doing this, like, 8 times in the last 2 years.

Pictured: today's spirit animal.

So anyway, drain those suckers, and let them sit in a baking dish while you prep everything else. Get your beef and half of your onion, and toss it into a high-walled pan, and start browning it. Traditionally, I think this recipe calls for ground beef, however, I live in Southern California, where "taco beef" is sold. I realize that to most people, this IS ground beef. However, here, it's more of a finely diced meat, as opposed to one that looks as though they threw a steer into a wood chipper. The finished product is more akin to a chopped steak-like matter, instead. So, if you have access to it, great! If you don't, also great! Just use a lean ground beef.

Meat meat meat meat meaty meaty meat meat

As this gets browned, chuck in the rest of your spices and onion, and mix it all thoroughly. It's going to smell amazing! But don't just start going fist-first into this giant pot of meat; you've got more to do!

Browner meat and spices.

Once this is done, toss in your rice, and start to combine.

Spiced, browner meat with rice.

Then you'll realize I'm an idiot, and I don't know what I'm doing. That rice isn't going to mix well. We need... lubrication! Get your tomato sauce, and pour about a cup into the whole shebang. I used a homemade tomato sauce (I should probably show you my recipe, huh?) that I use for everything, and it worked great. I'm sure this would also work quite well with any canned sauce, jarred sauce, or anything similar. But if you're draining your spaghettiOs or Chef Boyardee to get sauce, I think we need to have a talk. Or you should probably just quit. Your Father and I have been talking, and we're very worried about you. We're all very worried about you.

I didn't say it would look appetizing.

So, stir that in, and heat through, until it looks like something you could, in theory, cram into your food hole. This would also be a good time to prep your oven, and heat to 350F.

Almost looks like food for my food hole!

Take your peppers, and stand them upright in an ungreased 8x8 baking pan. Start stuffing them with the filling, making sure you shove it down into the little crevices in the bottom of the pepper. Fill them up, and make sure they're standing. if they're falling over, lean them into each other. These don't need to be strong, independent peppers; it's okay if they need each other.

MY PEPPER DON'T NEED NO MAN, IT'S A STRONG, INDEPENDENT PEPPER

Once these puppies are ready and stuffed, top them with extra sauce, so they're covered. 

Awwww, they're like little, gross, wet hats!

Once your oven is preheated, cover them with foil, and sock them into the oven for 45 minutes. If you don't want the tomato sticking to the foil, toss some toothpicks in the tops, so it's not touching.

Adios, muchachos!

While those things are cooking, I guess you could do somrthing productive, like make a salad. When I eat these, I tend to argue it's a complete food source, but I'm probably wrong. So do what you'll do, and I'll go play videogames or browse the internet for dog photos or something.

When you hear your timer go off (you did remember a timer, right? No? *Stern look*), take the foil off, and let those things cook for another 15 minutes. The tops will tighten up a little, and darken. it'll look nice.

Is this food? This looks like Food. I think it's food. I'm going to eat this.

Look at that! Stuffed peppers! A word to the wise. These things are going to be hotter than Satan's butthole, so it might be a wise decision to let them sit for a few minutes. I can't remember the last time I didn't burn my mouth on these. But they're pretty tasty, and look pretty good when they're cut open.

See? I stuffed it right.

It's not the most appetizing-looking meal, but it sure hits the spot. The salty beef mixes so well with the rich tomato, and gets some much-needed body from the rice. I've done versions with beans and cheese, as well as spicier versions full of chilies, crushed red pepper, and cumin. The world is your oyster, and you're the Pope of your peppers.

Served great with a lighter beer, this is an easy meal that you can make ahead, and then just bake the night you need them. I'd recommend not doing this more than 48 hours before, in case the pepper gets soft. But overall, it'll be delicious! Trust me.

Enjoy! -AC

Stuffed Peppers

Recipe from Scott McDonald (Average Cook)

Serves 4 adults, or one man with a stomach with a volume that rivals most oil drums.

• 4 large bell peppers
• 1 pound ground beef or taco beef
• 2 cups prepared tomato sauce 
• 1 cup cooked white rice
• 2 large green onions, chopped
• 1 tsp salt
• 1 tbsp crushed garlic
• 1 teaspoon of chili powder
• Cayenne and black pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 350F. Boil a pot of water to parboil the peppers. Core and seed peppers, and cook in boiling water for no more than 5 minutes. Drain peppers and set aside. Brown the beef with the chopped onions, draining fat as necessary. Add spices and mix. Add rice and 1 cup of tomato sauce, combine and heat through. Fill peppers with the mixture, and put into 8x8 dish. Top with additional sauce. Bake, covered in foil, for 45 minutes. Remove foil, and bake for additional 15 minutes. Let sit for 5 minutes to cool before serving. Can be made ahead and baked at a later time.